Self-Pity

I should be cleaning. I'm expecting visitors, friendly and otherwise. I hate cleaning. I wish I was one of those people that when angry/sad they clean like maniacs. Instead I'm one of those people who are overcome with lethargy, and apathy.

I want to cry, but know I shouldn't.  I've been so upset that I've even ignored the Twins! If you knew me, you'd know that's HUGE. 
I missed whatever lesson I was supposed to learn from this "trial"... it seems completely pointless.  
I need a God to Laila lecture... complete with maps of my supposed path...  slide shows of past experiences, analyzed and explained in minute detail... and detailed instructions, or reference manuals, for future events... 

I'd pay for that.


Oh, for more of the same (a.k.a. bad news)... my perfect little yellow house that I instantly fell in love with... has been sold. Ugh.